Been There. Doing That.

2:34 AM Elizabeth Seckman 44 Comments

Get your IWSG Tee HERE!!
And visit or Join the IWSG HERE!
Been here? Done that? Well then, you need to get the tee-shirt!!!

Seriously. Go buy your tee shirt. I'll be wearing mine in a week to ten days, and I'm not sharing. 

Thanks to Alex Cavanaugh, our fearless leader, and his minions of the month: Charity Bradford, S.A. Larsen, AJ, Tamara Narayan, Allison Gammons, Tanya Miranda!

This month's insecurity is how to deal with social media. Or more precisely, figuring out how to navigate all the online fights and squabbles. Left and right, there was plenty of crap slinging here in the USA over the last couple of weeks!


Now, don't get me wrong- I'm all for standing for your beliefs. Difference is good. Debate is good. 

Name calling and broad-brush, knee-jerk judgments are NOT good. And as a Christian, my religion (by my understanding) teaches me that God is the creator of all. 

From the earth and stars to the humans I feel more like choking than hugging- they are all loved by Him. And I'm sure that like any good Father, He's probably not impressed with us picking up His mantle and acting as judge, jury, and emotional executioner. 

I know, I know...each side wants to save or educate the other. But with neither side wanting to budge, social media quickly devolves from friendly gathering to hellish reunion where siblings beat the snot out of each other as they vie for parental approval. 


*In an effort to maintain full disclosure and honesty:

 I'm working hard on practicing what I'm preaching, but in my heart, I'm still feeling more like this:


But I'm getting there!! 

44 comments:

  1. I agree, and think the kitty poster speaks to the point well.

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  2. So much truth here. I like a quote I found this week. Tact is the art of making a point (standing by your beliefs) without making an enemy.

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  3. What a cute kitty. I really wish people could talk things out peacefully. Not everyone thinks and believes the same things, but how hard is it to talk and show some respect.

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    1. I couldn't agree with you more. There are plenty of things in this world I disagree with, but I also remember that at the receiving end of any rant I may be compelled to make, is a human being.

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  4. It's been my experience lately that the Christians are the ones trying to be respectful, only to get blasted by the other side. I've been trying to adopt your attitude, take a deep breath, and just love people.

    Finding the happy medium between standing up for our beliefs and being loving isn't easy. if we so much as say 'I think you're wrong,' we get accused of hate. :(

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    1. I've seen both sides be ugly, but yes, it does seem like mocking Christians and blaming them for every bad is in vogue. Someone posted a link to story about a gay man being beaten up over the decision. They posted the story with the status update that was something about Hey Christians- is this what your faith does, or something. I read the entire article. The assailant said nothing about religion. It seemed like alcohol was more of a precipitating factor than religion. Yet, my faith was blamed. There is no call for that. And it's not exactly open minded.

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    2. Exactly. Gay bashing is awful. But blaming all Christians and our faith is just as bad as racism.

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  5. Some people just refuse to pull their head from their arse and see another's view. It is okay to have your own, but that doesn't mean everyone has to agree with you. Then they go all name calling because they have no better way, idiots. I agree with the last, just go away lol

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    1. My dad always said, you know you've lost the argument when all you have left is name calling!

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  6. I couldn't agree more! I've actually steered clear of the news and social media for this very reason. I don't want to feel attacked and I don't want to be angry, so instead, I stick my head in the sand. Maybe not the best approach, but it's working so far! ;)

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    1. I logged off for several days. I'm not opposed to sticking my head in the sand- or my toes.

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  7. I know exactly what you mean. I stated my feelings in an open way on facebook, leaving room for everyone to feel differently. Whew! Firestorm. It all ended peacefully, but it could have easily gone the other way.

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    1. You are very good at standing on a position without getting ruffled feathers if people don't agree with you. I've found some people just have no tolerance of an opposing view.

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  8. Well-said. I've pulled back way back on social media this summer as my daughters and I are having a Summer Unplugged . . . if I wasn't an author with obligations to my publisher, I would've left social media altogether. It's just bananas now. Yelling at each other solves nothing, & all this HEAR ME NOW crap is driving me nuts.

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    1. I've been slacking online also. My kids are home and growing up way too fast. I hate be be in front of a computer for hours when I could be talking to them.

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  9. Yes! I've avoided talking about anything to do with what's going on because I have friends on both sides of the board, and there's a lot of nasty comments going around. As a non-confrontational person, it certainly makes me uncomfortable.

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    1. We two peas could hide in a pod together. I have good friends on both sides of the current issues and I'd do about anything to avoid conflict myself. I hate drama, and conflict falls in the drama category (or so I tell myself when I straddle the fence and watch them lob crap at each other.)

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  10. God loves everyone and as His children, we are to love everyone as well.

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  11. I've avoided commenting on pretty much anything. Lol.

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  12. Cute kitty!

    That's why I keep my personal opinions off social media. I can discuss it with my family and friends, but don't like to get into it with anyone else because arguments always pop up.

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    1. That's smart, Chrys. It's hard to get inflection across in comments too, so many times people may be coming off as more aggressive than they intend.

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  13. I LOVE your kitty poster! WANT!

    Yes, social media is a huge mass of humanity. Squabbles, differences and downright meanness will occur all over the place. Sigh. Whatcha gonna do?

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  14. Social media can be exhausting just to watch sometimes! Love the kitten picture, though.

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  15. Awesome T-shirts. My daughter came home the evening on the day of the supreme court decision and threw her phone on the couch simply because she was sick of everyone throwing their attitudes around on social media. And for my daughter to treat her phone like that takes a lot.

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  16. Social media has provided a place for people to carelessly toss out hurtful & unfounded comments without facing the person they are attacking. I avoid the conflicts at all costs. As my mama said, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."

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  17. Everyone who gets a T-shirt should take a picture with them in it. :)

    And I try to stay out of religious and political discussions on social media and most of the time in real life too. I have my views. They're allowed to have their views. They can disagree with mine. That's okay, but I don't agree with the name calling and bashing and all that.

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  18. I love that last photo. I'm trying really, really hard to just silently love all those involved in the online war of words.

    And I'm getting a t-shirt, too. :) The IWSG one, but maybe we need another "Love one another" one.

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  19. I know exactly what you mean! It's really getting to be a drag. Sometimes I think the young ones are more mature than the adults. I love the kitten pic! Hugs.

    PS - No choking of the ignorant allowed! Xoxoxo

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  20. I don't recall people being so abrasive when I was younger. Now people judge you on your political and religious beliefs and, whether in person or online, get real ugly.

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  21. Whether you're a Christian hating gays for existing or a gay person/ally bashing Christians who don't fall into the above category, please just stop it. You're not helping matters.

    God, Entertainment, & Annoying Things

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  22. Social media is wonderful and terrible. Wonderful in that it allows us to connect. Terrible in that people can be very cruel when they type on their keyboard (and say things they'd never actually SAY... or I hope they wouldn't). I think it's slowly taking away our compassion and empathy for other humans. And that is sad. Very sad.

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  23. Divisive topics are just off limits on my site.

    The more people scream "respect my views and opinions," the less other views and opinions get truly respected. Intolerance is generated by those who claim they are the voice of tolerance. You can't win.

    As Christians, we need to remember that no one wants to corrected by a stranger, but it is amazing the amount of positive change that can come from the love of a friend who genuinely cares about someone.

    Relationship - not religion.

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  24. I like the meme. Go away meanies! There's no room for you in my life!

    -T
    Tanya Miranda - Writer, Dreamer, Intergalactic Superhero

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  25. We are made in God's image. Only He has the authority to pass judgement.

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  26. Elizabeth...

    So true. Things are COMPLETELY out of hand. Blasting back and forth on social media is wrong, willful, and just plain NASTY.

    We all should and NEED to show respect for one another and our own beliefs.... Mathew's scripture is a difficult one, but I've been pushing myself to practice it lately after what had happened to me with the owners who pulled the deal to my future home at the very last minute.

    Hate and anger need to be cleaned for us to grow ....

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  27. I am very careful how I come across on social media. I don't want to have things I've said in the past come back to haunt me. I have strong beliefs, but I will share them in the privacy of my own home/pub/friends' homes. I sit back and watch chaos ensue without being compelled to join in.

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  28. From what I've observed on social media, if someone puts up a controversial article, someone else is going to bash it. Some people are always looking for arguments and some refuse to see things from a viewpoint other than their own. That is why I avoid certain topics online and I keep those for conversations with friends, family, and church. It is also my way of showing Matthew 5:44; I love others by sticking to subjects that are positive and edifying on social media :)

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  29. Yeah, there's a bit of s%!7 slinging on social media right now. I don't like all the hate speak and it stems from the two sides being unable to see the other's point of view.

    I've erased my comment four times now because, like you, I don't know how to proceed without hurting feelings and stirring the pot. At this point, the cat's out of the bag. The Supreme Court is the final word. Gay marriage is here (in my opinion, for the better of our nation and the doctrines our founding fathers sought to protect--they were fleeing religious persecution, after all). As the saying goes: it's all over but the crying.

    It's despicable the way people treat Christians for their faith. It is despicable the way people treat gays for being who they were born to be.

    I think part of the trouble is that Christianity has, historically, made some very poor choices and used the name of God to commit many horrific crimes. People who are not Christians often fear Christians. When you fear a thing, it's easy to turn it into a entity that isn't human. It's easy to lose sight of the fact that there are real people on the other end of those fb accounts. That real people who identify with the thing being called out are reading it. And that knife cuts both ways.

    For every person posting their reaffirmation that to them marriage will never include same sex partners, there's a boy praying to God to tell him why he's different, why would God make him gay? And his faith and who he is are strongly at conflict that he is considering killing himself. People think it isn't a problem, they think their words don't hurt, but they are living in a different world. They live in a world where they've never been asked to leave a restaurant, or told they couldn't buy a house together because they weren't married, or had to be fingerprinted to live in the same home as their own child, the one they held at birth, the one they get up in the middle of the night to feed, and somehow, there's a government agency who thinks it has the right to tell them no and treat them like a criminal?

    To the gay community, this is a major victory because many people in the LGBT community are treated like criminals. This ruling has been a validation, a recognition that we are people too.

    This should be a celebration, but as usual, the internet has devolved into it's usual bullpucky.

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