Sea Monkey Master

12:01 PM Elizabeth Seckman 29 Comments

                                           Meet Gabriel. 

                                      The Sea Monkey Master. 
The Official Sea Monkey Site

I have wanted sea monkeys since I was a little shrimp.

My brother and I combined our piggy banks, squelched the urge to purchase the 'get buff by summer and don't get sand kicked in your face supplements' on the opposite page of the comic book, and ordered our Sea Monkeys. 

We got our kit. We followed the directions...and nothing. 

Tried a few more times. Still Nothing!

My dad, the scientist, let us know we were wasting our money on brine shrimp...the aquatic equivalent of lab mice.

I abandoned my Sea Monkey obsession for "Tiger Beat" magazine and a love for Sean Cassidy. (yes, I know...I'm dating myself!)

Twenty years later...I found Sea Monkeys again. (at Wal Mart, of course!) 

I bought them, um, for the kids. We followed the instructions to the letter. 

I was hopeful. Finally...Sea Monkeys!


Dumped it out with curses cast toward the the company for the fleecing of children (and whimsical adults).

Then, being the eternal optimist (or insanely stubborn)...I bought them again as a Christmas present for boy #3 (see Carter, you made the blog!)

Once again we followed all the guidelines. And it looked like we failed again.

Then Gabriel visited. He recognized the green plastic aquarium in the kitchen.

Gabe: "Cool. You got Sea Monkeys too?"
Me: "No. We have an empty tank. Stupid Sea Monkeys."
Gabe: "Sea Monkeys are neat."
Me: "You've seen Sea Monkeys?!"  
He just nodded, with a look of wonderment that his aunt responded like he just confessed to seeing Big Foot riding waves on the Loch Ness Monster. 
Me: "For real? From the kit?"
Gabe: "Yes."
Me: "Nuh uh."
He laughs and drops to the floor. I can read his mind...'my aunt is sooooooo weird...but she gives me bananas and chocolate chip cookies, so I will put up with her'
Me: "Well then, what's the secret?"
Gabe: "I don't know. Just grow them. Put them in a window with light, but not too much and then just feed them."
Me: "That's all?"
He nods his head.

I follow his advice. 


He returns, so I grill him some more.

Me: "Gabe, you really saw something in your tank swimming around?"
Gabe: "Yep."
Me: "Not just an algae? Are you sure you don't just have a bunch of algae?"
Gabe: "Well, they eat algae. So you want algae." He didn't add a 'duh', but I could hear it in his voice.
Me: "Did you use binoculars to see them?" 
Gabe: Slaps head. "No. Just be patient. Just leave them in the window and wait."

So I waited longer. December to January to February...the failed green mess almost got the flush countless times...but every time I went to give up, I'd think of Gabe. I knew he would chastise my lack of patience with a laugh and googly eye roll. 

March. Three months past Christmas. This is getting ridiculous!

This weekend, I was washing dishes. The sun was shining in the kitchen window and movement...INSIDE the Sea Monkey tank...caught my eye!!!

I looked and there they were. Four little white critters! 

No, they aren't wearing crowns. No they aren't wielding scepters. And I doubt they ever build any castles.

But they are REAL! They do exist!

I just had to be excruciatingly patient. 

Patient past the point of common sense. 

Am I disappointed that they look like something that if I saw them in a pool I'd refuse to swim in till it was cleaned? No. 

I've come to accept that when dreams come true...they are still harnessed by the laws of reality. 

So, what dream are you waiting on to hatch? 


  1. Ha! I had no idea how to care for sea monkeys. Maybe I'll try to "grow" them with my kids.

    1. I guess the trick is to just do nothing. Kind of like waiting on a query!

  2. Patience. That seems to be what I need. Great story :) My nephew LOVES sea monkeys. He grows them and names them. Then he gets mad when his mom calls the wrong sea monkey by the wrong name. LOL!

    1. Oh my! They would be hard to tell apart! Your poor sister.

  3. I doubt I'd have much luck with sea monkeys, but if you ever decide to take on an ant farm, just stop by my yard. They just finished off their own Mt. Rushmore on my front lawn.

    1. We had an ant farm for a while too. That creeped me out. At least if the monkeys are spilled, they won't run around the house!

  4. You got 4! The king, queen, boy, and girl. Now I want to get some.

    1. You're right! How cool.
      You can get your own by following the magic link above!

  5. OH.MY.GOSH!
    I need to google these darn things. And now you've planted a seed and I'm not sure if I will be able to wait 4 month for the little buggers to make an appearance. CRAZY and WONDERFUL! Dreams DO come TRUE!

    1. Yes they do Leigh! Go buy yourself a sea monkey and enjoy!

  6. I always wanted Sea Monkeys, too! I finally fulfilled this wish in college. Yep, I had that plastic tank right on my desk. They did great - had babies and everything! I was so happy. But then something terrible happened - my sister (who I was sharing an on-campus apartment with) grabbed her books and accidentally tipped over my Sea Monkeys! All dead. Every single one :(

    1. Cool, that they did so well; sad that your sister killed them :(
      Did you do anything special to keep them thriving?


    1. Is that you Mom? I am tipped off by the probably accidental large caps...

  8. You killed a lot of sea monkeys to get four sea monkeys!! haha. I feel like I could have sea monkeys in my apartment, they're like fish. lol.

    I think I might be too impatient.

    1. With all you do Ashley, you could set the thing up...go to school and work and such...then boom...four months would be past and you'd have pets! (another bonus, no tank cleaning, they like it dirty)

  9. Read this post with my five year old who saw Gabriel and HAD to know who he was - I told him - That's the SEA MONKEY MASTER - and he believed me. Gabriel might think that was funny . . . cute post

    1. Gabe will most definitely like that! Though, he'd probably rather be called football master, but hey, fame is fame!

  10. This is a really good post. I enjoy reading your writing.

  11. Ha! I love this post. Hey if you waited that long you deserve your Sea Monkeys.

  12. And they're getting bigger every day. I'm just so proud. (though my son keeps reminding him, they technically belong to him)

  13. Go Gabe:)

    And I have no idea what a Sea Monster is :)

    PS... yes I do carry the picnic stuff, too. (a bag from McDonalds, a bag from Taco Bell, etc. :)

    1. You need to buy some. They look like little sea horses.
      And Hey! That's how I picnic too!!

  14. "I've come to accept that when dreams come true...they are still harnessed by the laws of reality."

    So true. SO true.

    I indulged the kids' and their Sea Monkey experiment one summer. They did indeed hatch from that freeze-dried primordial soup they arrived in. The jig was up when their tiny little carcases lay strewn across the valley of death, where all Sea Monkeys go when they aren't fed their magic powder!

    *My* dream that finally hatched? Well, I'd wanted a horse of my own since I was, yeah... thirteen. Got my little ponies and my horse 'bout twenty years later. Believe me, I wished on every last turkey bone, shooting star and four-leaf clover I could get my hands on till I got them!

    The reality was... they ain't cheap and they add a LOT more poo to my compost than those chickens or ours do. Win. Lose. Win. Just like life.

    Such a fun posting, Elizabeth! You're a good Mama!

  15. Thanks Scarlett. Glad your dream came true, sorry about the realities. :)

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