I'm playing catch-up and operating on a computer that runs as fast as I do in a marathon.
Translation? We both go slow and have to pause for breathers every other second.
To save my sanity, I'm not going to try to do anything fancy with this beast. Instead, I'll pray that Best Buy calls me for a pick up tomorrow so I can do a better update next week.
Until then, here's my contribution to Chrys Fey's blog hop!
Congratulations to Chrys Fey on the launch of her new book, Tsumami Crimes! To help Chrys spread the word, I'm participating in her blog hop...a pretend news story about a pretend tsunami.
"This is Chrys Fey reporting for Disaster 5 News. I am in Nags Head, North Carolina where a tsunami hit yesterday morning. I have Elizabeth with me, a survivor of the tsunami. Elizabeth, can you tell our viewers what happened, and how you survived?"
Oh lordy! I saw it coming from way out. I was just sittin' on the beach minding my own business when I saw that wave coming right at us. At first, I was like, "Hey boys grab your boogie boards. It's a dandy!" But then I noticed it kept growing higher and higher until it seemed to block out the sun. I knew then, this wasn't a wave to play in. So, we took off running. My husband and kids...well they run a whole lot faster than I do. They kept trying to drag me along, but I was winded so I told them, "Save yourself. I'll be all right."
I didn't really think I'd be all right at all, but that's what you've got to say to get your family to leave you. Come to think of it, I didn't have to argue with those SOBs at all.
But anyhow, they ran off to safety and I stood my ground- ready to take on that wave. When it hit, my body just sort of floated. I'm not sure if it was angels lifting me up on their wings or the higher than usual fat cell count in my ass. On way or another, I floated right to the top of that wave and was set safely on a the other side of the island.
I like to call it my Twinkie induced miracle.
I didn't really think I'd be all right at all, but that's what you've got to say to get your family to leave you. Come to think of it, I didn't have to argue with those SOBs at all.
But anyhow, they ran off to safety and I stood my ground- ready to take on that wave. When it hit, my body just sort of floated. I'm not sure if it was angels lifting me up on their wings or the higher than usual fat cell count in my ass. On way or another, I floated right to the top of that wave and was set safely on a the other side of the island.
I like to call it my Twinkie induced miracle.
Title: Tsunami Crimes
Series: Disaster Crimes #3
Author: Chrys Fey
Genre: Romantic-Suspense
Page Count: 272
BLURB: Beth and Donovan have come a long way from Hurricane
Sabrina and the San Francisco earthquake. Now they are approaching their
wedding day and anxiously waiting to promise each other a lifetime of love. The
journey down the aisle isn’t smooth, though, as they receive threats from the
followers of the notorious criminal, Jackson Storm. They think they’ll be safe
in Hawaii, but distance can’t stop these killers. Not even a tsunami can.
This monstrous wave is the most devastating disaster Beth
has ever faced. It leaves her beaten, frightened. Is she a widow on her
honeymoon? As she struggles to hold herself together and find Donovan, she’s
kidnapped by Jackson's men.
Fearing her dead, Donovan searches the rubble and shelters
with no luck. The thought of her being swept out to sea is almost too much for
him to bear, but the reality is much worse. She’s being used as bait to get him
to fall into a deadly trap.
If they live through this disaster, they may never be the
same again.
DIGITAL LINKS:
PRINT LINK:
99 CENTS: Amazon
And everywhere ebooks are sold.
GIVEAWAY!
I guess Twinkies are miracles since they could survive anything.
ReplyDeleteVery funny, Elizabeth!
They can't survive a week in my cupboard. LOL
DeleteMost enjoyable Elizabeth.
ReplyDeleteYvonne.
Thanks Yvonne!
Deletelol twinkies sure have plenty of perks. An ass as a flotation device is a win.
ReplyDeleteIt truly is a win, and I worked hard to earn it.
DeleteHmm. Does this mean I can start eating Twinkies right now for my health? Brilliant! (Loved the part where the boys outrun you. My kids might do the same.)
ReplyDeleteMost certainly, especially if you live in a flood zone.
Delete"Hey boys grab your boogie boards. It's a dandy!" HAHAHA!!!! That made me laugh-out-loud.
ReplyDeleteThank goodness for Twinkies. ;)
Your survival story sounds a little like how Disaster Chrys survived. ;)
Thank you for participating in my blogfest!!!
It was fun, Chrys. Best of luck with your new release!
DeleteTwinkies will save the world!
ReplyDeleteI need that on a tee-shirt.
DeleteLOL, Elizabeth. Rescued by Twinkies!
ReplyDeleteSuch a delightful way to survive.
DeleteTwinkie-induced miracle...I love it! Lots of fun humor in this post, girl. Great job!
ReplyDeleteThanks Susan!!
DeleteFirst what's up with your cupboard Liz? Second this was a fun tale and twinkie miracle it is! Glad you survived.
ReplyDeleteYou mean the computer? The motherboard went bad= on two of them. Perhaps I'm hard on motherboards.
DeleteOr if you mean why does my cupboard not restock Twinkies by magic? I don't know why.
I Love the twinkle induced miracle. Gotta get me one of those. Glad you survived.
ReplyDeleteI would recommend Twinkies to everyone.
DeleteROFL, nice. Love it. I think it was the angels lifting you up.
ReplyDeleteJuneta @ Writer's Gambit
You're so sweet to sat that. :)
DeleteLOL!!!! Good short, Elizabeth!!! Congrats to Chrys!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Cathrina!!
DeleteOMG, Elizabeth - that was hilarious! I'm still giggling over here and I'd like to think my rather large bum might rove itself as useful some day. Congrats to Chrys and have a great weekend!
ReplyDeleteThere are plenty of uses for a healthy bum- extra seat padding, warmth in the cold, and a reserve area for nutrition in times of starvation.
DeleteFat obviously serves a purpose! I'd say embrace those Twinkies...kind of like a life raft.
ReplyDeleteYou could probably strap them all together and use them as a raft too.
DeleteUGH. Computer problems are the worst. SO sorry you're having to rely on the Geek Squad to get you going again. Fingers crossed for you!
ReplyDeleteGeek squad delivered. I'm back up and running at full speed.
DeleteWhat a great story Elizabeth! You had me laughing out-loud!
ReplyDeleteThanks Erika!!
DeleteHope Chrys' book is doing great. Loved the tone of your story. Ride the waves, I say.
ReplyDeleteWonderful philosophy...ride the waves.
DeleteI love this. I can just imagine the dialogue between you and your family.
ReplyDeleteYou, dramatically: "No, please, go on without me!"
Family: "Oh, okay. Sure."
You: "What? No, you're supposed to be conflicted about this! WTH?"
That's pretty much the way it goes. My guys don't wrestle with guilt like I do.
DeleteHehehehe this entry made me giggle. Great voice, by the way. :-)
ReplyDeleteAww, thanks Misha!
DeleteLOL! Elizabeth, you're a hoot. Yay for Chrys! Somehow I completely missed the signups for the blog hop--probably because I took December off and left town for a big chunk of January. Whew! Time to get back to normal, eh?
ReplyDeleteI was out most of December too. My kids are growing up so fast, time spent with them is precious and I don't like to work when they're home.
DeleteLol, thank God for Twinkies!! ;)
ReplyDeleteThey are delightful.
Delete