A Moron and a Pretty Baby
My niece, Tabitha posted this on Facebook. She's a new mommy, and this was her first run-in with a busy-body stranger.
Being the good aunt that I am, I thought I'd share a bit of observation and advice.
First, the observation...
Arrogant people who judge a stranger's parenting usually think their own offspring are perfect.
And we all know that there is no such thing as perfection. Anyone who thinks they have somehow achieved absolute perfection from their own child rearing efforts, either have kids they never spend any time with and don't know what rotten things they get into or they are delusional.
Now for the advice...
As a new mom, I was insecure and worried about everything. I was afraid that any and every parental misstep would cause my children to grow up to be ax murderers.
Fortunately, I had smart people to guide me.
Fortunately, I had smart people to guide me.
Wisdom from my grandmother:
As a mom, no one knows your child better than you. You love them most and have more emotion invested in their upbringing and development than anyone else.
You will know better than anyone what your child needs.
Whether it's discipline, a hug, or some cute painted toes...as a mom, you know better than anyone else.
You will know better than anyone what your child needs.
Whether it's discipline, a hug, or some cute painted toes...as a mom, you know better than anyone else.
Let your heart lead you. Love your child and do what you think is best.
Wisdom from my big brother (Tabitha's father):
F' em if they can't take a joke.
Now, let's take a moment for a break down with pics!
Now, let's take a moment for a break down with pics!
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| What a cutie-pie! What sort of curmudgeon could call this sweetness a whore? |
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| I know, Paislee...I find it hilarious, too! It's okay, baby, some people are just stupid. |
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| And about your mommy being too young? Mommy's old enough- we just have good genes. |
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| And Pailslee knows better than anyone- her daddy is crazy about her. |
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| And contrary to the foolish observation... they're happily together. |
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| And finally... The comment about your Aunt Taylor, whom the crazy lady said had wrinkles. Well, obviously the woman is blind. |
It was homecoming week for my son's school. During this week, we get the football players treats. On Wednesday, the restaurant we hired to cook the wings had a fire in their kitchen. Quick regrouping...a restaurant worker brought the wings to our concession stand and the Wing Wednesday tradition was a go!
Rachel grew up in a tiny town in Minnesota. She still lives there with her husband, their four kids, three cats, and a perfectly overweight black lab. She coaches high school speech and theater, rides Arabian horses, reads as much as she can, and writes stories.
Connect with the Author here:
In this modern day retelling of Rapunzel, Anya has her books, her photography, and her daydreams. She doesn’t think she needs anything else.
She lives in a house on the edge of town with her adopted mother, who goes to extreme measures to keep her daughter safe. Anya doesn’t even go to school, but instead has a private tutor. Anya tries not to acknowledge her loneliness; she puts her efforts into pleasing her mom, and gives her heart to her stories, secretly wishing for a story of her own.
Then one day at the library, the only place she's allowed to go, she takes a picture of a beautiful boy.
Before long she's lying to her mom, and sneaking out late at night to meet Zander. But Zander wants more than a secret romance. If Anya wants to be with the boy of her dreams, she will have to risk her relationship with the only other person she's ever cared about.
Unbelievable! Some people shouldn't be allowed out in public at all. :)
ReplyDeleteDon't Fall sounds like a book!
Glad your wing celebration was a success.
I need to get that book. Rachel is a fantastic writer!
DeletePeople can be amazing. I think the rude ones are few in number, but like black clouds, they can suck all the light out of place fast.
I'd go with delusional for most of them. I second the fluck em remark haha
ReplyDeleteI think you're right. I left out the possibility of being on crack...that's an option too.
DeleteAwesome pics and a great post to read.
ReplyDeleteHave a great week-end.
Yvonne.
Thanks Yvonne!
DeleteWhat a horrible thing to say to someone you don't even know. I have seen some twelve year olds who were dressed inappropriately, but chill lady - she's just a baby.
ReplyDeleteI've seen them too. But still, if their parents don't mind, not my place to say anything. I'll leave that to their grandmas. In't that what grandmas are for?
DeleteSome people are interfering busy bodies. Dreadful things to say to anyone. Apart from which, if painted toenails makes you look like a whore, I know a lot of whores.
ReplyDeleteGood point! I guess I'm a whore too. I better call Chad, he owes me money. LOL
DeleteWow. I am so glad I am a hermit. I was just telling my wife the other day that I love meeting the neighborhood pups when I walk Sissy and Molly...but the people are icky. I'm so glad I escaped the corporate world. People are just icky.
ReplyDeleteDogs really are fabulous creations. I have never been judged by a dog.
DeleteAwww, how adorable. As my mom and I always say, "I hate people!" Why does everyone have to be so judgmental? And it especially comes out when it comes to parenting. I can't imagine what parents go through, but I've seen it happen to my friends for years. I had two friends who tried nursing and it didn't work (one whose baby was getting sick from malnutrition)--in both cases, their DOCTORS told them to stop and they got nothing but judgmental comments from their friends. It was pure craziness. And now everyone's so freakin' obsessed with crazy diets and such. No matter what you do, there's going to be someone who has something to say about it.
ReplyDeleteThe breast feeding stress. That is a whole 'nuther post. I've had friends have to stop breast feeding and they beat themselves up so much over it. I was bottle fed- I'm relatively normal. Breast feeding is the hardest thing, in the beginning. Then it's like the easiest thing. But that beginning...and if you have health issues, a job, other kids, etc. it's nearly impossible to get over the hump from hard to easy.
DeleteWe need to relax a little and maybe try offering a bit of support instead of harassment?
Some people are just plain crazy.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for sharing about Don't Fall, Elizabeth! :)
Carzy, self-absorbed...
DeleteI need to get a copy of your book and add it to my to-read list. I can always count on you for a good read!
What a horrible thing to say. On the other hand, your niece should definitely smile and say thank you if she's told she looks too young!
ReplyDeleteI know!! I didn't appreciate that trait when I was her age either. I worked in juvenile services after college and people kept mistaking me for the client or the client's girlfriend when I accompanied them to court.
DeleteCongrats Rachel on Don't Fall re-release. That individual is a disgrace to both genders. Sending a million virtual bees up her butt hole. I said it. Jerk going around attacking babies and making happy couples insecure. Let's be happy instead and stare at cute happy pics. *Stares* Hi baby!
ReplyDeleteShe does take the most adorable pictures. Such a cutie!!
DeleteI agree with Yolanda on all counts. One of my biggest regrets in life is sitting silent when people were rude to me, excusing them and thinking I had to rise above. Now I'm old and grumpy and honest. I laid into one rude salesgirl so hard once she cried. (I felt kinda bad, but she picked the wrong day to determinedly try to talk me into something ridiculous.) I'm usually a cheerful person, but I don't take crap anymore. Busybody lady can count herself lucky she didn't run into me... I breathe fire when I'm ticked off now, and she'd have gotten burned. If you don't go after people like this, they'll go on thinking they can act that way to anyone.
ReplyDeleteI have found the older I get, the quicker I pop off at the mouth. I think we realize life is just too short for stupidity.
DeleteWell now doesn't that just piss you off.
ReplyDeletePretty much :)
DeleteSometimes saying nothing is so much better than saying things like that.
ReplyDeleteI can't imagine approaching a stranger and saying something rude. O
DeleteYour poor niece! Who does that? I swear, people are awful sometimes. But, baby, mom and dad all look happy and wonderful. Good for them!
ReplyDeleteI'm honestly not sure what comes over some people. I suppose it starts with a certain degree of arrogance that they know what's best for everyone else?
DeleteWow. That kind of blows the mind, what that woman said. I'm glad your niece has you to help her sort through some of this. And you're right. There's no such thing a parenting, and even if there were, what you think is perfect and what I think is perfect--and what the kid thinks is perfect--would be different anyway.
ReplyDeleteYou're so very right about that! Perfection is in the eye of the beholder.
DeleteYour niece and her baby are beautiful. If I had a baby daughter, I'd dress her up in the cutest outfits like this, and I'd paint her toe nails, too, because I think it's adorable. My mom always painted my nails when I was little. I'm not sure if she did it as a baby, but I would. I am shocked for your niece. This woman had no business saying any of that.
ReplyDeleteI always said if I had a daughter, I'd have broken the bank on all the cute, girly clothes. I mean they'll only be your baby doll for a while. Pretty soon, they'll want to pick out their own clothes and toe nail polish. LOL
DeleteWhoever would say such a horrible thing about such an adorable baby (about ANY baby!) is a joyless miserable person who wants to suck the joy out of other people, too. She's to be pitied... and then ignored.
ReplyDeleteThat book sounds fantabulous!
Perfectly put, as usual. Pitied, then ignored. Then I'll hope she runs into Lexa Cain who will verbally take her out. :D
DeleteWow. Just wow. People can be so mean.
ReplyDeleteYeah, and mean people suck.
DeleteWow. Just wow. People can be so mean.
ReplyDeleteWow, I can't imagine saying anything so critical to anyone, let alone someone I've never met. And to say such a thing about a baby is disturbing to say the least. I would have considered calling the police! Congrats to Rachel.
ReplyDeleteThere has to be a deep unhappiness in your soul to jut walk around spreading criticism wherever you go.
DeleteBeautiful baby and family. That nasty stranger was/is jealous and probably not at all well.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations, Rachel!
Can you imagine living every day with someone like that? I bet she's a peach to buy gifts for!
DeleteGrrrrr
ReplyDeleteSome people should be bound and gagged and thrown into a huge fire ant pile.
Sounds like a great read, Rachel. Congrats!
Sounds like a plan to me!
DeleteWow. The cruelty and nastiness in some people. *shakes head* I will never understand how people can behave like that. Your niece's baby (great-niece?) is adorable. Congrats to the new mommy and daddy!
ReplyDeleteGrats to Rachel!
Yes, I am a great aunt- that means I'm either doubly fun or doubly old :)
Deletewow, someone people clearly have no understanding of the impact of their words.
ReplyDeleteCongrats to Rachel.
Some people are obnoxious, they should just learn to keep their mouths shut. Paislee is such an adorable baby. Hugs to the cutie pie.
ReplyDeleteObviously the person hasn't seen the movie Bambi or taken to heart Thumper's advice. "If you can say something nice... don't say nothin' at all."
ReplyDeleteCongratulations to Rachel!
A woman who would make a comment like that towards a darling little baby proves that those 'people of Wal Mart' memes that we see are all too true. What a weirdo? No wonder we teach our children not to talk/listen to strangers. Just shaking my head and thinking, 'what is wrong with people?'
ReplyDeleteYay for Rachel!
ReplyDeleteI was one of those young looking moms. At 23, people were mistaking me for 17...which was a tad bit frustrating. With my 3rd kid, everyone assumed he was the first and that I hadn't been married very long. *sigh* I think we need experiences like that to open our eyes and keep us from judging others, eh?
What is with people to go up to a total stranger and say something like that?? Particularly about a baby? Unbelievable.
ReplyDeleteThe baby pictures are adorable. What a beautiful family!
Glad your Wing Wednesday turned out okay. Congrats to Rachel! Sounds like a great read!